Losers Team scores: Russian grand prix

Yes, this is a graphic of Mick Schumacher saying "beep beep" while driving a car. Nothing to do with the upcoming commentary. We just wanted to include it.

Russia was the final default-DRS race of the season. Unless your team moved your DRS to an earlier race (looking at you HAASN'T A CHANCE and Panda Pops), all of your points were doubled in Russia.

One team was forced into playing a Pitlane Punt at the last race because of our super irritating tool called Break Assist. Guess what. It paid off handsomely. They won a tonne of points, doubled because of DRS, and sailed into the Sochi sunset, bottle of celebratory Russian vodka in hand.

Not actual vodka. We don't give out prizes at the F1 Losers League. We give out disappointment and bathos. But not prizes.

Carry on reading to see how Losers teams scored at the Russian grand prix.

BIGGEST LOSERS IN RUSSIA

Here we go...

• A resurgent Mancunian Badboy Racing topped the points in Russia. Their score of 156 was largely thanks to a DRS-doubling of their Ocon Odds-On Pitlane Punt success (see below).
• Cruthers Car Co. landed 2nd place with 94 Losers Points, with Schumacher and Williams continuing to pour in the points. (See note two paragraphs down.)
• It was Haas and Latifi that helped Haas Beens to 92 points and joint 3rd. Their namesake is serving them well.
• Speaking of team names, It’s a trap Lando! could have been the motto for the last few laps in Russia. They score joint 3rd and 92 points as well, largely thanks for Schumacher and Williams. (Edit: We missed some points for Lando! They actually scored 2nd place in Russia, not joint 3rd. Sorry to burst your bubble, Cruthers.)
• It was a Haas and Latifi combo that helped LockedDownLosers to 92 points in Russia, placing themselves alongside the others in joint 3rd. 
• And good scoring across the board for NEEEOOOOWWWW put them in joint 3rd with 92 points. So many 92 points.
  
  

TEAM ACTIONS IN ITALY

DRS: 

• This was the final DRS race of the season, and that system is now decommissioned. Finished. Kaput. Every team except HAASN'T A CHANCE and Panda Pops ran with double points in Russia. DRS is dead. Long live Boost Buttons.

Pitlane Punts:

• In August, we introduced Break Assist to help struggling teams. At the Monza grand prix, Assist forced a poorly-scoring Mancunian Badboy Racing to play the Ocon Odds-On Pitlane Punt. It worked! Ocon finished in 14th, and Badboy get 60 points doubled by DRS to 120.
• So many Punts completed at the last race, the only other Punt in play is Steady Jordan's Hungry Hungry Yuki punt. With less than a day to go on the Yuki stopwatch, it looks like this Punt isn't going to land.

Fast Forecasts:

• At the last race, Break Assist forced Thomas's Tractors to play a Fast Forecast, predicting Tsunoda would finish the race in 11th place. He hobbled home in 17th place, so the Forecast was lost. Because the Forecast was Break Assisted, this costs Thomas nothing. 

Ejector Seats: 

• Pierre Ghastly made a big switcheroo, dumping Williams and replacing them with Haas, and ditching Mazepin (the Pit Garage Rule means you can't have Haas and Mazepin in the same team) and replacing him with Tsunoda.
• Steady Jordan kicked Giovinazzi out of their team and replaced him with Raikkonen.
• Every race, Break Assist means the lowest scoring Losers team gets an Ejector Seat automatically played. Last time, that was The Tour de France is Better, so they lost Raikkonen and gained Giovinazzi, a move that already earned them an extra 12 points in Russia.

Take a team action. See your personal team page here, or use the various links above.

PODIUM OF SHAME

There are some terrible things in this world. Marmite. Tea without milk. Love Actually. But nothing is more terrible than a Losers team that forgets how to lose. These are the worst performing teams in Russia.

• Although they came 22nd and 23rd, Panda Pops and HAASN'T A CHANCE avoid our wrath: they didn't double their scores with DRS, and if they had done, they would have been much higher. 
• Which means the third lowest scorer in Russia was Not good on the BENds, coming 21st with 44 puny points. Poor scores across the board.
• Next up on the Podium of Shame are Clean Trolls, whose 30 points leaves them in 24th place. Another zero score from Perez for them. Oof.
• Not for the first time, Murraylivesforeverinourhearts find themselves in last place with 26 points. All of their team members scored but, well, rubbishly.

Break Assist: 

Break Assist exists to "help" Losers teams that don't score enough points. And by "help", we mean poke with a burning stick.

• The randomly-selected low-scoring team picked to make a Fast Forecast is The Pit Lockers. At the Turkish grand prix, they will be predicting an 11th place Race Result for Vettel.
• The low-point-scoring Losers team that has been randomly selected to gamble on a Pitlane Punt is Not good on the BENds. They are now playing the Hungry Hungry Yuki punt, betting Tsunoda will talk about food any time in the next month. The stake is 10 points (waived by the League) and the odds are 5:1.
• Here's the cruncher. For ending up in last place, Murraylivesforeverinourhearts are forced into using one of their Ejector Seats. With immediate effect, they lose Stroll from their Losers team. He is replaced with Schumacher.

LOSERS TEAM SCORES IN RUSSIA

1st	Mancunian Badboy Racing	156
2nd	It’s a trap Lando!	102
3rd	Cruthers Car Co.	94
4th	Haas Beens	92
5th	LockedDownLosers	92
6th	NEEEOOOOWWWW	92
7th	Fernando Analonso	86
8th	Thomas's Tractors	86
9th	Gunther's Gonna Get Ya	80
10th	Team Name	80
11th	Nikita Mazepimp	78
12th	Lou-sers	74
13th	Pierre Ghastly	74
14th	The Tour de France is Better	72
15th	Steady Jordan	70
16th	The Pit Lockers	64
17th	VroomDoom	62
18th	WereDrivingInReverse	62
19th	Back of the shed	56
20th	Tardi Minardi	48
21st	Not good on the BENds	44
22nd	Panda Pops	42
23rd	HAASN'T A CHANCE	40
24th	Clean Trolls	30
25th	Murraylivesforeverinourhearts	26

Note: Error corrected in scores for It's a Trap Lando!, moving them from joint 3rd to 2nd in Russia

MORE POINTS

Here are the Race points for Russia.

And here's how it's affected the Standings.

Access your personal team page here.

WHAT'S NEXT?

We next go losing in Turkey on October 10th (season calendar here). With the Lucky Spanner now live and Boost Buttons in place, there's one last big League action for this season– the release of every team's fifth Ejector Seat on October 13th. And to spice up the closing races of the season, we'll release more Pitlane Punts soon.