Wednesday, 22 June 2022

Standings after the Canadian grand prix 2022

Here the latest standings following the 2022 Canadian grand prix.

We have a new leader of the F1 Losers League. Vladimir Mazepin finally overturns Team Name's seven-race-long lead of the championship, and sees their sister team Nikita Putin creeping into third for that extra level of threat. Strolling the ranks and Work Shop Boys reach new highs in the standings, the latter shooting up nine places.

Latifi and Haas retain their lead of their respective loserboards, with the highest risers being Lando Norris and, thanks to beige flag Track Points, Lewis Hamilton.

Read on for the full Standings.

Losers team commentary: Canadian grand prix 2022

Mick Schumacher poring over paperwork with his engineers, saying "Work Shop Boys? This is like Kraftwerk, yes?"

BIGGEST LOSERS IN CANADA

  • 1st Work Shop Boys 101  |  Good punting and the best Booster of the race, barely diminished by a minor Forecast loss
  • 2nd Strolling the ranks 98  |  A double Pitlane Punt success underpinned their marvellous Montreal
  • 3rd Nikita Putin 83  |  Didn't particularly excel with Track Points, but got a let-up from some plucky punting
  • 4th Vladimir Mazepin 76  |  Along with their sister team in 3rd place, VladMaz were one of only two teams that won three Pitlane Punts in Canada
  • 5th Pierre Ghastly 74  |  Helped by punting on Williams' poor performance
  • 6th Double Daley 69  |  The best Track Points of the race
This is the commentary page for the Canadian grand prix, featuring highlights of the Losers team action. For this race's full Losers team data featuring everyone's scores, see the data page.

Carry on reading this commentary.

Losers team data: Canadian grand prix 2022

Here is the complete Losers team data page for the Canadian grand prix. It features all the Losers team scores at this race, including Track Points and points from Boosts, Forecasts, Punts and Ejector bribes. 

For the commentary page featuring just the Losers team highlights, see the commentary page.

Carry on reading the data.

Track Points for drivers and constructors: Canadian grand prix 2022

Sergio Perez lost in some bushes, saying "I'm sure I parked it here somewhere"

Sergio Perez conked out pretty quickly during F1's return to Canada. To add insult to injury, he was made to walk back to the pits along some kind of shrub-strewn gully, like he was foraging for twigs or something. His earliest exit ensures he is the top-scoring driver alongside homeboy Nicholas Latifi, whose career path looks bumpier than Hamilton's shuddering helmet.

Haas were by far the worst constructor in Canada. It was if they were playing a game of pontoon and they dealt the perfect 21: a picture card – last place – and an Ace – retirement. That last place ensures Magnussen / Haas earns the biggest drop Track Points. 

Meanwhile, McLaren made a dogs dinner of a double-stacked pitstop, ensuring Norris / McLaren scooped the raceday special Track Points for spending over 43 seconds in the pitlane. This is the last time the raceday special is earned for pit time: for July and August, it pivots to the race-finishing car that finishes the most number of places behind their teammate.

Read on for all the Track Points in Canada. 

Wednesday, 15 June 2022

Standings after the Azerbaijan grand prix 2022

Here the latest standings following the 2022 Azerbaijan grand prix.

Team Name retain their lead of the Losers League, although they're looking super vulnerable. Although the top three haven't changed, we can feel something tipping in this loserboard. Mancunian Badboy Racing, It's a Trap Lando, Group Team Name, Camber Gamblers and Spoiler Alert have all reached new high points in the table, with It's a Trap Lando rocketing up a massive 12 places. Be worried, teams, be very worried.

Magnussen is now the second worst driver, and Haas takes a comfortable lead at the top of the constructor rankings.

Read on for the full Standings.

Losers team commentary: Azerbaijan grand prix 2022

A troubled Carlos Sainz saying "I did it for the Losers League"

BIGGEST LOSERS IN AZERBAIJAN

  • After coming 3rd in Monaco, It's a Trap Lando get 1st place in Azerbaijan with 97 points. Top Track Points and the best Booster.
  • Mancunian Badboy Racing's second double-Boost earns them a second 2nd place in a row, on 96 points. Wow, that was confusing to write.
  • パンダポップ enjoyed their best score of the year. Their 92 points, gained from good Track Points, good Boosting and a Punt win, gets them 3rd place.
  • Their sister team Panda Pops are just behind, clocking up 4th place with 90 points. Same reasons as パンダポップ. Definitely a joint strategy going on.
  • Yet another Boosted team. This time it's Spoiler Alert, who get 78 and 5th place in Azerbaijan.
  • Joining this top scoring, er, group, is Group Team Name. 6th place and 76 points. Fun fact: they're nothing to do with Team Name. We think they're just goading them.
No teams really gained from Ferrari woes because Ferrari aren't on anyone's Losers team. Dammit.

This is the commentary page for the Azerbaijan grand prix, featuring highlights of the Losers team action. For this race's full Losers team data featuring everyone's scores, see the data page.

Carry on reading this commentary.

Losers team data: Azerbaijan grand prix 2022

Here is the complete Losers team data page for the Azerbaijan grand prix. It features all the Losers team scores at this race, including Track Points and points from Boosts, Forecasts, Punts and Ejector bribes. 

For the commentary page featuring just the Losers team highlights, see the commentary page.

Carry on reading the data.

Track Points for drivers and constructors: Azerbaijan grand prix 2022

A pit crew wrapping a rear wing in tape, saying "keep wrapping!" and "Yuki's going to love this birthday present"

When Carlos Sainz's car trundled to a halt in the Azerbaijan grand prix, it could be attributed to Carlos's trademark lack of luck. When his teammate Charles Leclerc's car pulled over, it detonated a huge hole in the F1 championship. More importantly, it easily gave us the biggest losers of the race. Big fail for Ferrari.

The five retirements included Lance Stroll quietly quitting with "unusual oscillations". And Yuki Tsunoda's broken rear wing needed so much gaffer tape, it gave him the Biggest Drop and Raceday Special points.

Read on for all the Track Points in Azerbaijan. 

Wednesday, 1 June 2022

Standings after the Monaco grand prix 2022

Here the latest standings following the 2022 Monaco grand prix.

Team Name's lead at the top of the loserboard is reducing. My heart will Grosjean move up to a season-best of third place behind Vladimir Mazepin. Big climbs from Work Shop Boys and Mancunian Badboy Racing, and some alarming tumbles for others.

In the driver rankings, Magnussen moves closer to that top three of Latifi, Vettel and Schumacher. Haas take over as the highest-scoring losing constructor in F1, joining Williams as the first triple-digit scorer on their loserboard.

Read on for the full Standings.

Losers team commentary: Monaco grand prix 2022

Perez surrounded by feathers, saying "my flutter won me 20 points"

BIGGEST LOSERS IN MONACO

  • In 1st place for Monaco are Work Shop Boys, whose Fast Forecast predictions suddenly came good, whose scores were bolstered by a splattered pigeon, and who brought Haas into their team with perfect timing. 111 points to them.
  • Mancunian Badboy Racing find themselves in 2nd with 108 points, largely due to running two Boost Buttons in Monaco. 
  • It's a Trap Lando lapped up the Track Points at this race, placing them in 3rd with 105 points. They were forced into an automatic Boost, which earned them a impressive haul of 55 extra points.
  • My heart will Grosjean also had really good Track Points accompanied by a Boost Button. A perfect combination. 96 points and 4th place.
  • Camber Gamblers also enjoyed a decent Boost Button result, even if it was foisted upon them through our automatic Boost system. Their 92 points gets them 5th position in Monaco.
  • And Group Team Name scored 92 points, which was good enough for 6th place. A beneficiary of the bird-shredding Wildlife Wager success. Poor pigeon.
This is the commentary page for the Monaco grand prix, featuring highlights of the Losers team action. For this race's full Losers team data featuring everyone's scores, see the data page.

Carry on reading this commentary.